Radiation

Today I had my first radiation treatment. I'm having these done to my entire pelvis to zap the spots in my hip bones. Apparently, there are 3 spots leftover and 2 new ones. I'll go every day for 10 days. Of course there is the possibility of damage and side effects, bladder and bowel issues, so we'll see how it goes. I've had good results from radiation in the past, so I'm expecting good things!

My endoscopy showed no cancer in my gastro system, which is wonderful! But I still have inflammation and gastritis, baby ulcers, he called it. He explained to me that the chemo could be causing all the upset. Since chemo works on rapidly growing cells in the body (cancer, hair, nails, etc.), it affects the stomach because - I didn't know this - the stomach lining is constantly renewing itself. So it's made up of rapidly growing cells. I'll probably have tummy problems until I get off chemo. And who knows when that will be!!! Ugh!!!!

I had blood drawn today, incuding a CA125. Maybe tomorrow I'll find out the results. In the meantime, I'm just keeping on keeping on. Life is hectic around here, so there's always plenty to keep my mind of myself. And that's a good thing!

Chemo #6 begun

Today I had my first infusion of Doxil. This will be my 6th chemo drug that I've been on. It's given once every 28 days for a total of 6 treatments. I have to go to the Lawrenceville office because the Northside location is all out of the drug. I've been to the L'ville infusion suite before, back in 2007 when I was on Chemo #1. It's just one big room with chairs all facing each other in a circle and within arms' reach of each other. Cozy. They do have a TV now, so that's an improvement. But it's not the same as my VIP room at Northside, no privacy and no personal perks like a remote control! If Northside does get the drug in, I can start going back there. But I figure once every 28 days is doable. The nurses at L'ville are super nice and friendly and I'm able to see Dr. S while I'm there for my monthly appts. I shouldn't complain.

The Doxil went fine today. It's a bright orange liquid (looks like Kool-Aid) and it takes 2 hours to infuse. Plus the pre-meds, we were there a total of 4 hours. John stayed with me this first time, in case I had a reaction to it. But it all went fine.

I've just been super tired lately. Falling asleep while standing up practically. Yesterday was my mom's 70th birthday and we all went over for dinner. I fell asleep on her couch for about 2 hours! "Happy Birth . . . zzzzzz!"

I did get the biopsy results on my stomach taken during the endoscopy - everything was benign! So I don't have cancer in my stomach for certain!!! The results just show gastritis which is a common result of chemo. And heavens knows, I've had enough of the stuff to eat through my stomach, intestines, and all!!! Seriously, though, I have heard of this happening, eek! Let's hope this Doxil is the magic bullet that rids me of all cancer entirely! Bang!!!

A friend on Facebook sent me this song and I've made it my new theme song. I just love it! And I hope you do, too!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvIEJ_PmqJ8

Endoscopy today

The gastro dr did an endoscopy this morning to see if there was anything going on in my stomach to explain the extreme pain. It just showed inflammation, nothing major stood out. He did take some biopsies and I go back in a week for those results. But I already had the PET scan and it didn't show anything suspicious in my abdomen. So, I'm thinking there's nothing there, just gastritis. When I got home, I had some yogurt and it settled fine. Then later, I had some strawberries and the pain was horrible!! It lasted most of the afternoon, even after taking Pepcids, Nexiums, and half a bottle of Maalox! It could be my stomach is just irritated from all the chemo. Maybe changing the drugs will help. For now, it looks like small, bland meals for me!

I also had an echocardiogram after the endoscopy to get a baseline score before starting the Doxil. In some cases, the drug can cause heart problems. All was good and I will start the Doxil on Monday. Since there has been a shortage of this drug, I will have to go to Dr. Salmieri's office in Lawrenceville for the infusion. The Northside office is out at the moment. This means no more luxury suite anymore. I'll be back in the one giant room with too close chairs in a circle and no TV. Once the Northside location gets the Doxil in, I can go back there. But since the treatment this time is only once every 28 days, it's not that big a deal. It's going to be so much nicer not to have to be in that chair every week like I have been for the past 7 months!!!

I also plan to see Dr. Levitt for a radiation consult. We're going to see if the spot in my pelvic bone can get radiation. More on that later.

In other news, we have a new addition to our family . . . Lily, the kitten. She is wonderful and we are loving having her. I have really missed having a cat since Chloe passed away last summer. Lily is the best medicine!

I hope everyone had a great Labor Day and is enjoying this cooler weather. Thanks for reading!!

The beautiful quilt

I want to thank the wonderful lady who sent me the quilt. She did not sign her name, instead she just wrote a note saying that God had moved her to give it to me. So, in essence, it is from Jesus! It's an amazing quilt and so beautiful. Embroidered on various patches are inspirational scriptures. I love to cuddle up with blankets and this one inspires me as well as gives me comfort. I don't know who you are, but you are an angel. I hope you know how much I love the quilt, and how much I appreciate you! God bless you!

Scan results

I did get my PET/CT scan results back. It's taken me a while to decipher them, but I think I got it straight now. Overall, there is improvement. The previous areas are smaller or stable. But there are 3 new areas causing concern. Two are lymph nodes - one in my lower left lung and another near my liver. The third is in my pelvic bone on the left side. Dr. S wants me to go back to the radiation dr for possible treatment of the pelvic bone. And he wants me to go on Doxil, a new chemo, for the two new lymph nodes.
What's weird is this huge lump in my abdomen didn't show up at all! So apparently, it's not cancer. It still hurts like crazy, so I made an appointment with a gastroenterologist for Friday to get it figured out.
So, I feel like, it's not as bad as I was thinking. Nothing massive and overwhelming, just lingering and pesky!
Hopefully, the radiation and Doxil will knock it all out for good! I get the next few weeks off, then I go back on Sept. 14 to get started on the next regimen. Will post again when I know more!

Like the new layout?

I decided a needed a fresh new look!

I had my Day 2 treatment yesterday and I asked the nurses there to check my abdomen. They were able to feel the lump, too. So I decided it was time to go ahead with the scans. I called Dr. S and we got a full body PET scan scheduled for this Friday morning. Not sure when I'll get the results, but I plan to make an appointment with Dr. S next week to go over them. I already have an appt tomorrow morning. It's at questionable times like this that I prefer to see him directly rather than communicate through voicemail messages. That's just frustrating.

Right now my main symptoms are the upper abdominal pain, that feels like heartburn, a lump in my abdomen, and an ache in my left hip. The right hip had the spot of cancer in it, but now it's my left hip hurting. My nose is still having its same issues that its had all this time from the Avastin drug, burning and bleeding (nice, huh!). And my chest still aches. It's better if I don't have any constriction across my chest and upper tummy, so I wear loose clothes and no bra most of the time. I know, women's lib would be so proud of me!! Oh, and I have an appointment tomorrow afternoon (after my Dr. S appt) with an endocrinologist about my osteopenia.

Good news, my jaw is all healed and giving me no problems, thank you, Jesus! And my hair seems to have stopped falling out, thank you again, Jesus! Of course I did forget to wear my cold cap yesterday. John and I got caught up watching Don't Forget the Lyrics on the TV and we missed the time frame. Let me ask you what comes next in this song, "Wake me up before you go-go 'Cause I'm not plannin' on going solo. Wake me up before you go-go ___ ___ ___ ___" No googling allowed! Hint: it's the second verse of the chorus.

Girls are good. RR has begun taking martial arts this year and SHE LOVES IT! It is so her thing - action, drama, excitement - I see her as the next action movie star! Caroline will be taking jazz beginning in September, and it is SO her thing. She's always dancing around the house and this summer, she and I both were hooked on "So You Think You Can Dance." It's going to be amazing watching her develop as a dancer!

John is good, mom is good, Jan and her kids, all good. We're all just hanging in there, taking everything that's handed to us in stride and doing the best we can. Being grateful for our blessings when they happen, and taking on the challenges with God's hand to hold. Isn't that what we all do every day!

I appreciate all the quotes and inspirational messages I have received, the emails and the snail-mail. It means so much to me that so many people are sending positive thoughts my way and prayers up to heaven. Just the encouragement fills me with good energy to keep on going, enjoying my life and all its blessings.

It's a struggle sometimes not to think the worst and wonder what my outcome is going to be. But one night as I was talking with God if I should be preparing myself and my family for the worst, he spoke to me in a loud and clear voice, "Stop it! Don't entertain any negative thoughts, don't even put them out there. I will take care of you! You just have to have faith." Okay, then! It was humbling to realize that I was trying to do His job, predict the future. I need to stick with my own jobs - praying, believing, and taking care of myself! "Message received, Sir, loud and clear!"

The rollercoaster rolls on . . .

So my CA125 is going back up. From 50 at last check to 56 today. And I'm having horrible pain in my upper abdomen. Thought it was heartburn/indigestion, but OTC meds don't really help much. And I feel a lump/mass in the side of my abdomen, could be inflamed muscle, don't know. I called the dr office with this latest news and Beth advised me that Dr. S would probably want me to finish this last round of chemo, do some scans, and see where I stand. I only have 2 more infusions after today. Part of me wants to stop them now. It's likely that these drugs have stopped working, hence the rise in CA125. If that's the case, what's the point in continuing with them. I'm debating about not taking the last two and going ahead with the scans. But in reality, we're only talking 2 weeks difference. And as John said, the drugs are working some. My levels haven't skyrocketed, just bumped up a little. I suppose he's right.

The good news is my jaw issue has resolved itself. I went to see the oral surgeon and he removed the loose bone piece. Afterward, all better! He said he has seen this occurrence with normal people, maybe injuring the gum and bone with a tortilla chip or something hard and sharp. A portion of the bone dies and works its way out like a splinter. Once it's out, it's over. And that has been the case for me. Thank you, Lord, for the easy fix to this one!

The oral surgeon did mention that osteoporosis meds can cause this problem, jaw necrosis. He kept asking if I was on any of them, Fossamax, Zometa, etc. I told him no, just the chemo drugs. He couldn't find any correlation between the Avastin and jaw necrosis. I must've been mistaken in assuming Avastin was the culprit.

But the irony is this . . . Dr. S ordered a bone density scan just to see if my bones were having problems and we found that yes, I do have osteopenia, the stage just before osteoporosis. He and Beth discussed putting me on osteoporosis meds now, but with the jaw necrosis already having been an issue, the meds are out. So for now, I will go see an endocrinologist and start taking calcium and vit D.

So it sounds like I'm a train wreck! But I know it could be worse, and that's what I worry about. I'm like the train heading toward the wreck! Let's just hope I make it out alive!

In the meantime, my sister is going through a nasty divorce that came at her out of the blue. It's amazing to me how people can change so drastically, scary actually. I worry about her and she worries about me and neither one of us needs the stress of the other! And my poor mother . . . well, you can imagine! Her doctor took her off her maintenance drug to give her a break. Let's hope her cancer continues to remain stable.

I know life is a journey and that God has a plan to give us hope and a future. I'm putting my faith in Him and holding on through the bumps and turns. Every day holds a new turn and a new possibility. I'm just taking it one day at a time.